Following his explosive appearance at last month’s Conservative Political Action Conference, Candidate Walmart is releasing a national campaign commercial reminding Americans that he’s the true conservative candidate, funneling money from the 99% to the 1% since 1952!

“Super Tuesday proved one thing; conservatives are unhappy with the Republican field of candidates,” said Candidate Walmart. “So I’m ramping up my campaign by launching my first national commercial, urging Americans to take a closer look at whether the GOP candidates truly share their values. The choice now is simple: stay with the status quo, or take a stand and vote for the candidate willing to champion corporations and the 1%. I’ve already taken a leading role in destroying the middle class in this country for the last 50 years, imagine what I can accomplish as leader of the free world!”

Check out the commercial and share it with your friends!

D. Weber
Campaign Manager
Candidate Walmart